Members of the MiddleWeb Discussion List and other interested
teachers are joining together to explore the Writing Workshop
and other ideas about supporting young adolescent writers and
readers. Juli Kendall, a reading-writing teacher/coach in Long
Beach, California, is helping moderate the discussion. Last year,
Juli kept a weekly journal from her Reading Workshop.
This year, Juli is continuing her journals, but this time she's
focusing on her Writing Workshop. Find out more about our project
at our Reading/Writing Workshop homepage.
You'll find Juli's background article here.
Links to many of the tools created by Juli and her colleagues
are embedded in these journals. Most often, when you click on
them, a PDF file will begin to download. You'll find a list of
the downloads here.
If you'd like to join the daily discussion that parallels Juli's
Journals, find out how here.
In the fall, at my editor's suggestion, I chose two students
from Writing Workshop to follow for the whole year (we've changed
their names). The original plan -- reporting on their progress
frequently -- gave way to a more realistic approach, since showing
growth over time for ELL students can be problematic. I've gathered
work samples of both students throughout the school year and will
do a final reflection in June.
Now that the parent conferences are over, the riotous gathering
of candy eggs has been quelled, the new reading series has been
distributed, and the playground Recreation Aides are back in control
of the basketball courts, I have to say that the homework I've
been assigned is leading me toward new ways of looking at student
work. And it all started so innocently.
Usually I do "looking at student work" with a colleague
or a department or a grade level or a mixed grade group of teachers.
We look for different forms of evidence of what students are doing
-- their strengths, their areas of concern. We make lists and
plan our teaching based on what next steps students need to take.
And we always consider whether or not the work matches the assignment
and if it shows proficiency.
But this time, I'm to do the analysis by myself -- part of a homework
assignment in a class I'm taking. They've given us "a framework
for thinking analytically about student work, particularly student
responses to assignments, class work, assessments, and other instructional
materials." They urge us on with words of encouragement:
"You may be surprised by the depth and breadth of your perceptions
about student work once you begin to focus analytically, and in
turn, student work will become a much more interesting and critical
resource of pedagogical information for you than it has been."
This homework makes me long for vacation. Wouldn't you?
To learn how to think analytically about my kids' work in Writing
Workshop, I'm using two pieces from
our unit of study about realistic fiction (Journal #23)
that were written by Manuel and Sophanna. I originally described
their work in Journal #4. Here are my
responses to the framework questions.
1. Look carefully at the assignment or prompt to which the student
work you have chosen responds.
What is the goal of this assignment? Students are to
write a realistic fiction story as a part of a unit of study on
realistic fiction in Writing Workshop.
Why is this an important goal for student learning of the subject?
Realistic fiction is listed in the content standards as one
of the types of writing students will learn this year. Students
demonstrate an understanding of how to write in this genre by
including a problem and solution, a plot, details about characters,
setting, etc. In addition, they are responsible for the qualities
of good writing: ideas and content, word choice, conventions,
organization, voice, and sentence fluency.
How was this assignment connected to other activities, in or
out of class? As a part of class and homework assignments,
students wrote in Writer's Notebooks to make a list of questions
about their subject for realistic fiction and then used the questions
to develop a first draft of their story. In addition, during reading,
students immersed themselves in the genre by reading realistic
fiction stories.
What specific concepts did students need to know in order to
complete this assignment successfully? They need to understand
how to choose a subject, develop questions about the subject,
use the questions to generate a first draft of their realistic
fiction story, have a peer conference to develop a plan of action
to revise their work, and write a final draft on the word processor.
If appropriate, what were the English Language development
goals? Were they met? Both students are English Language Learners,
so writing fluently is one of their goals. In addition, they work
on using a variety of sentences, expanding their choice of words,
communicating their ideas clearly, using appropriate organization,
and writing with a strong, personal voice. Their goal for conventions
is to improve their grammar and spelling.
What misconceptions would you predict might appear in student
responses to this assignment? Students frequently become confused
about how best to begin the lead for realistic fiction. They might
use "Once upon a time" as if they are writing a fairy
tale. Also, they can have difficulty understanding how to develop
a problem and find a solution within their writing.
In what ways did you intend this assignment to extend students'
thinking about the topic? Students are familiar with fiction
but are only beginning to understand that it can be very realistic.
By participating in this unit of study, they learn that fiction
is not just about fairy tales, fantasy, and wild imagination.
It can be about regular, every day kinds of events.
2. What does each student do correctly? Incorrectly?
Manuel's story, "How to
lose a pet," begins with a strong lead. He includes a problem
with a solution. His choice of words helps to get his message
across. He writes with a strong voice, but his ideas are somewhat
confused. He adds another story on to the end, which adds to the
disorganization of the piece. He has difficulty with the sense
of some of his sentences. Even after editing, he has several misspelled
words. He does not capitalize "mexico" or use periods
between some of his sentences.
Sophanna's story, "My Puppy
is Great," also begins with a strong lead. It is well organized
with some smooth parts. Her voice shows individuality and what
she truly thinks about her subject. Some of her sentences are
choppy and awkward, but most are clear. She has some good parts
in her ideas and content. Her spelling is excellent. However,
her word choice gets the message across but doesn't capture the
reader's attention. In conventions, she struggles with verb tense
and the use of commas in a series. Additionally, she does not
have a problem/solution in her story.
3. For each of the students you have chosen, jot down brief
descriptions of the following features of the response to your
assignment.
Most striking feature of the response:
Manuel's response is written in a block of text, without paragraphing.
Sophanna's writing is well organized with three distinct paragraphs.
Patterns in the response:
Manuel writes in a cycle: he got a dog, he let it go, he got
in trouble, and then it happens all over again.
Sophanna writes lists of a series of things and works at placing
commas correctly. She does this twice.
Misconceptions each response reveals:
Manuel writes his realistic fiction piece in first person,
as if it was a memoir.
Sophanna also writes her piece like a memoir and leaves out a
problem/solution.
Insights each response reveals (if any):
Manuel understands the importance of a strong lead. He also
has a realistic problem/solution.
Sophanna's piece also begins with a strong lead. In addition,
she finds a way to end her story.
What feedback did you give each student?
When I conferenced with Manuel about his story, "How
to lose a pet," we worked together to use the student friendly
writing rubric to evaluate his piece. I pointed out to him that
he includes a problem with a solution, his choice of words helped
to get his message across, and he wrote with a strong voice. We
also discussed how his ideas are somewhat jumbled since he adds
another story on to the end which confused the organization of
his piece. We looked at the difficulty he had with the sense of
some of his sentences. We also checked his misspelled words and
talked about why he did not capitalize "mexico" or use
periods between some of his sentences.
Sophanna and I also used the student friendly writing rubric to
evaluate her story. "My Puppy is Great," began with
a strong lead. We found that it was well organized with some smooth
parts and that her voice showed individuality and what she truly
thought about her subject. We noticed that some of her sentences
were choppy and awkward, but most were clear. She had some good
parts in her ideas, and I pointed that out to her. Her spelling
was excellent. Although her word choice got the message across,
it didn't capture the reader's attention. In conventions, she
struggled with verb tense and the use of commas. I mentioned that
she does not have a problem/solution, so she needed to revise
her story.
1. What is each student's most essential misunderstanding or difficulty?
Manuel misunderstands how to create a plot and follow a story
line. He wraps back around several times which makes it confusing
to read his story.
Sophanna switches verb tenses frequently. She moves from the past
to the present and then back again.
2. How does each student's response fit into what you already
know about this student's understanding and performance? Be specific.
As an English Language Learner, Manuel struggles with writing
clearly. In an effort to get his message out, he often develops
organizational difficulty, as well as problems with grammatical
correctness.
Sophanna, also an English Language Learner, is using more complex,
interesting sentences in her writing. But she still has grammatical
difficulty, especially with verb tense.
3. In two sentences for each student, describe what each learned
from this assignment, judging from the responses.
From this assignment, Manuel learned the importance of writing
a strong lead. He also learned how to develop an interesting subject
for his realistic fiction story and create a problem, which had
a solution.
Sophanna learned how to craft a strong lead. She also learned
the importance of using important details.
What does each student need to do next to move his or her understandings
forward?
In order to move his understandings forward, Manuel needs
to write more stories that follow a simple, straightforward plot
line. He also needs to indicate paragraphs in his writing, use
capitals and periods to mark sentences, and check his spelling
for errors. When he does his revisions, it would help him to read
the story out loud and listen for where it doesn't make sense
or gets confusing.
Sophanna can move her understandings forward by working on using
a consistent verb tense. She needs to practice this when she writes
in her Writer's Notebook so that she can develop fluency. She
also needs to work on revising this piece so that it includes
a problem with a solution.
-----
At last, my homework assignment is completed, and I find myself
"surprised by the depth and breadth of my perceptions about
student work." After a whole unit of study about realistic
fiction, some kids are still not "clear on the concept."
Revisiting these papers would probably be well worth our time
during the upcoming unit of study about revision.
And now, time for vacation!
"How to Lose a Pet"
by Manuel
It was morning, and people were sleeping and snoring out loud.
We were going to go to the air port. When we got their my mom
was getting the tickets. My Dad was smoking outside. My Dad was
taking care of her. My dog was in the gate. This was my chance.
To let my dog go I lifted up. My dog went running so fast my mom
dirrent see it. When we got to mexico. My mom saw the gate it
was emty. Then she know I let it go. Then I got punish they buy
me a other dog I dirrent play with him because I was punish then
my punish was over then I went outside. And let him go. But I
got punish for a year this time.
"My Puppy is Great"
by Sophanna
It was Friday at 7:00 am, that's when I went to the pet store
to buy a puppy that is nice, play alot, healthy, and sweet and
soft. I want a normal puppy too. Then I found a puppy that I wanted.
He is light brown and he has brown eyes and don't fight. He is
very happy to see me, and I buy him.
I like him so I will name him Browny because he is so cute. He
even follow me everwhere I go. Browny like to eat the healthy
dogfoods I brought for him. I went with nobody to the pet store.
I gave him a red collar that has his name, our phone: number,
and address. I cheer him up whenever he is lonely. If he is sad
I will make him feel very happy with me. Whenever I cried he came
and lick my tears on my cheeks and he cheer me up. We both was
very happy.
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