Members of the MiddleWeb Discussion List and other interested
teachers are joining together to explore the Writing Workshop
and other ideas about supporting young adolescent writers and
readers. Juli Kendall, a reading-writing teacher/coach in Long
Beach, California, is helping moderate the discussion. Last year,
Juli kept a weekly journal from her Reading Workshop.
This year, Juli is continuing her journals, but this time she's
focusing on her Writing Workshop. Find out more about our project
at our Reading/Writing Workshop homepage.
You'll find Juli's background article here.
Links to many of the tools created by Juli and her colleagues
are embedded in these journals. Most often, when you click on
them, a PDF file will begin to download. You'll find a list of
the downloads here.
If you'd like to join the daily discussion that parallels Juli's
Journals, find out how here.
Two weeks studying revision! It's enough to make strong teachers
tremble. "We are ultimately problem-solving animals,"
says Donald Murray. "I can have problems of subject, of meaning,
of organization, of communication, of language. Each identified
problem, exposed and defined by rereading and rewriting, usually
presents possible solutions."
This unit of study is helping us to solve problems like never
before. For our Writing Workshop, it's a whole new understanding
of revision. While we continue writing poetry, we're leaving behind
our old ideas and heading into new territory. We're working "to
change students' concept of revision from punishment to a natural
and integral part of the writing process." In addition, we're
beginning "to change students' concept of revision from editing
skills, practiced at the end of writing, to a process that occurs
throughout all the writing stages." (The Revision Toolbox,
p. 2)
At the beginning of Georgia Heard's new book, The
Revision Toolbox: Teaching Techniques That Work, there's a
helpful explanation of revision.
Revision involves changing the meaning, content, structure, or style of a piece of writing rather than the more surface changes that editing demands. Students also need to understand that revision doesn't necessarily take place after they've finished a piece of writing, but instead revision will most likely occur throughout the writing process. (p. 1)
As I read Heard's list of the best ways "to include the process
of revision within a workshop," (pp. 3-6) I'm surprised to
see that we've used more than half of the suggestions without
realizing their positive impact on revision. Here's what she suggests
(that we're already doing):
Expose students to a variety of good literature. This year
during our units of study in writing workshop, we've read memoir,
feature articles, persuasive essays, realistic fiction, mentor
authors, nonfiction (thematic study), and poetry by published
authors and student authors.
Teach mini lessons on craft. Following up on Journal
#10, "Craft Begins With Learning to Read Like a Writer,"
and our unit of study on the craft of writing, we're "continuing
discussion of what makes up the qualities of good writing"
and "demonstrating these qualities in mini-lessons."
During our unit of study about Realistic Fiction, Journal
#23, I used Barry Lane's book, After the End, Teaching
and Learning Creative Revision, for additional help with mini
lessons on craft and revision.
Have students revise writing inspired by self-chosen topics.
We've worked hard to make sure that what students are writing
comes from a topic they have chosen, not just something that was
copied from an encyclopedia or written as an assignment, like
the infamous "State Report." Maurice's poem, "Football
Celebration," which follows later, is a good example of a
self-chosen topic.
Help students continue to develop confidence and independence
as writers. Pearson's Gradual
Release of Responsibility model helps us understand how responsibility
for kids' learning needs to be moved from the teacher to the student,
not all at once, but gradually over time. In writing, as well
as reading, it's all about teaching for independence.
Since there's always room for improvement, with additional guidance
from Georgia Heard we're adding these suggestions for how to teach
revision in our study of poetry during Writing Workshop.
1. Kids share the process of writing rather than their
finished writing. As our kids write their poems, they work
in small groups to share their writing process--how they come
up with their ideas and make their writing decisions.
"I used my feature article to help me. It was about Deion
Sanders. I used Ruselle's poem, Culture Celebration, as
a model. (Journal #32) I looked over some
old research that I had about him. I just started writing and
I compared myself to him." Maurice (who writes under the
influence of football and Deion Sanders)
"Yesenia and I worked on something we could do. We got
a piece of paper and wrote all the rhyming words with 'pig.' And
then we used them to make a poem, 'A Pig That Wore a Wig.'"
Maria
"My cousin read us poems she writes about her own self
and her life. She's 17 years old. Then an idea hit me and I wrote
it down in a little blue book with a feather on it that she gave
me. I wrote the whole poem down at one time. It's called 'You're
the One.'" Susan
"I read another poem. It's my favorite poem. I wrote it
into my collection. In my poem, 'The Girl Who Made the Right Choice,'
I changed a few words and added a character." Amanda
"I thought of the poem, 'Roses are Red.' Last year my
teacher taught us to first read a poem, and then draw the picture.
Then you can write the poem on the picture. My poem is called
'Flowers are Blue.'" Blanca
"Get a poem book and read them. Get some ideas from the
book and then write." Manuel
"I write a rhyme poem. I know how to think about them.
I first think about a word that I know, so I put 'bear' on my
list. Then I think about another word that rhymes with 'bear.'
I think about all the alphabet. I take the 'b' out from the bear
and try to add a word on it. Then I put it in a poem." Sophanna
2. Share examples, quotes and reflections from professional
writers about their writing. I recently received a copy of
the book, Advice to Writers: A Compendium of Quotes,
Anecdotes, and Writerly Wisdom from a Dazzling Array of Literary
Lights by Jon Winokur. Using quotes that emphasize revision
and poetry, we discuss the advice these writers have for us. The
kids really enjoy this. It's amazing to hear them speculate about
what these writers are saying.
"The best writing is rewriting." E. B. White
"Read and revise, reread and revise keep reading and revising
until your text seems adequate to your thought." (until you've
said what you're trying to say) Jacques Barzun
"Always dream and shoot higher than you know you can do.
Don't bother just to be better than writers who've lived before
and writers who live now. Try to be better than yourself."
Anonymous
"Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it; boldness
has genius, power and magic in it." Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe
"Just get it down on paper, and then we'll see what to do
about it." Maxwell Perkins
"Breathe in experience, breathe out poetry" Muriel Ruykeyser
3. Encourage students to reflect on and write about their writing
and writing process in writer's notebooks. Using their Writer's
Notebooks, the kids reflect on their writing process for poetry
and share their advice about writing.
"Never give up. Try your best. Believe in yourself. Look
at a book to help you. Just do it! Get it down on paper. Reread
your stuff. Start with the things that you have in your mind."
María
"First, you have to read to get the ideas from the book."
Blanca
"Every person has a brain for poems. Poems are stuff to make
you happy. Poems can be about every thing in the world. All the
information you have--put it down." Mary
"Start with what you like." Yesenia
"I write, write, write every story and poems so it could
make me better. Try it." Lorena
"Listen to music while you write. It will give you ideas."
Daniel
"Write what you like and mean it from your heart." Vanessa
In The Revision Toolbox on page 108, there's a Revision
Survey, which we use to explore our current understandings about
revision. Here are the questions, including some responses from
our kids:
1. What is revision?
Maybe a person who checks your work
I think revision is when you did something in the writing wrong.
I think revision means when you look over or rewrite.
I think it is to go back and reread.
I think that revision means to go over your work.
Revision is like when you write poems of any kind of thing and
you check again
I think is writing it again to make it better
Clearly, the kids' basic understanding of revision has to do with
going back, checking, and rewriting. The comment that says "I
think it is to go back and reread," encourages me.
2. How do you feel about revising? Do you like to revise your
writing? Why or why not?
Yes because I could go back and check.
I feel great. Yes! I like to revise my writing because you could
think more about it.
Yes, I like to because you may get better on writing.
Yes because it makes us more smart.
Yeah, to make it better than before.
Yes because it makes me a better writer.
I like to revise my writing, like picturing a picture in my head.
Amanda is still hanging on to her dislike of writing poems. Realistic
Fiction is her love. "I do not like to revise my writing
because I do not like to write poems," she replies. Perhaps
she sees revision as "punishment," although what seems
to work best for her is a writing conference; she's a very verbal
writer. "I like to write. I just don't like to write poetry,"
she says when I ask her what she thinks is the problem. Different
strokes for different folks.
3. Please describe one example of a revision technique that
you've used in the past.
I check my paper and write again on a new clear page.
When I write, I go back and check if it is right or wrong.
I write more.
Checking the writing with somebody
I go back and correct and fix mistakes.
When I have to rewrite my work
Computer
There's always one brave soul who marches to the beat of a different
drummer. "I saw a colorful bird last week," Mary writes
in response. I wonder if she's just confused or actually sees
revision in a different way.
For teaching revision through poetry, I'm using three mini
lessons from The Revision Toolbox.
"Creating your own thesaurus" (Words, pages 15-20)
"Chiseling words, revising prose into poetry" (Structure, pg. 43)
"Put yourself in your writing" (Voice, page 54)
Through this unit of study we learn something new-that revision
shouldn't be a punishment but rather a pleasure. Donald Murray,
also, understands this:
"Above all else, the act of revision is central to the pleasure of making. When we build a house, bake a batch of cookies, cut a cross-country ski trail through the woods, write an essay, we add to the world. And in the making we lose ourselves."
And, as we lose ourselves in our writing, we find ourselves as
writers.
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