Entry #44: A New Position --
A New Chance to Stir the Pot

A few Monday mornings ago, I waited anxiously as teachers from all over the Philadelphia School District made their way to Split Rock Lodge in the Poconos. About 70 teachers, librarians and administrators had signed up to take part in our annual PACES Trek.

A Trek is like a retreat for educators, a time to reflect about our purpose, our work, our roles and our future. Our trek was built around the essential question: "How do I employ democratic principles in my practice to encourage and support a school culture that promotes substantive student learning?"

We spent the week unpacking the question as individuals, in school teams, and as a fledgling learning community. We talked, we read, we used protocols to focus our feedback about the work which was brought to the table.

All participants shared dilemmas in triads and used the "consultancy protocol" to give and receive feedback. In a consultancy, teachers get the undivided attention of their peers for up to an hour. It's amazing to receive that kind of attention from other educators! Usually we are so busy that we talk on the fly between classes, or maybe over lunch, but we rarely get the undivided attention of like minded adults, and it shows.

The participants were knocked out by the power of this experience. One after another, they filled out feedback forms which expressed their surprise about, and appreciation for, the insights which they shared.

In addition to being surprised by the perceptiveness of other teachers, some participants were amazed by the understanding which was demonstrated across school and or grade levels. Watching as the age old barriers between high school and elementary teachers disappeared was truly inspirational!

A new position: Teaching and learning network coordinator

My concern about the artificial barriers that exist between teachers is especially heightened at this time. I have just accepted a position as the Teaching and Learning Network Coordinator for one of the Clusters or sub-districts in Philadelphia.

While I am excited about the possibility of meeting and working with a growing number of teachers, I am worried about being seen as an outsider, a non-teacher or worse . . . .

I am anxious to understand why and how we get cut off from each other as we all struggle toward the same goal(s). Why do teachers who leave the classroom become immediately suspect? Why do so many teachers think that other teachers can't understand their dilemmas?

I think I am aware of some of the pitfalls inherent in my new position. I don't want to see myself as, or be seen as, a "fixer." I'm not interested in sharing foolproof recipes for success. However, I do hope to stir the conversation pot and bring more voices and viewpoints into play. How can I facilitate this process? How can I help build a network of teachers, administrators and parents?

How can I unpack the Trek question in my new position? What "democratic principles" and practices can I bring to bear as I strive "to encourage and support a school culutre that promotes substantive student learning" throughout our Cluster?

Feeling like a queasy administrator . . .

I've been a parent for almost 25 years, a teacher for twelve and I'm about to become a quasi-administrator. How can I blend these experiences into an effective whole? Right now I'm feeling more like a queasy administrator...HELP!

I just returned from my vacation, and I'm a little like a character in a B-grade movie. I'm stuck in the dream sequence where every night I wake up once or twice and I'm vaguely aware of having dreamt about school, either the one I'm leaving or one of the ones I'll be working in this fall. None of the dreams make much sense, and I never get to finish a single one. I guess you could say my anxieties are showing.

On Thursday I went Whale Watching on the St. Lawrence and connected with a fifth grader from the Bronx. We had a fine time together, but I was a bit glum after our boat ride. I began to question how I'd fare without my regular dose of what I call "kid fixes."

I am acutely aware of how much I rely on my students as a barometer. Kids help me to stay on track. As a classroom teacher I always had kids in early to hang out and use the computers. I called it computer club or homework club, but in reality, it was a relaxed way to start the day. It was a time to really connect with kids and figure out what was working and what wasn't.

Now, I won't have my own classroom any more. No more regular doses of kid-based reality. This fall I will be a visitor.

Moving beyond the "company" mode

I'm thinking about my home now and the ways we behave when we have company or visitors. It's not quite natural, it's a bit formal and somewhat guarded. How can I move beyond the company mode to the position of a welcome and trusted family guest?

How often must I visit? What are the basic proofs I must muster to win the trust of my new enlarged student and colleague pool? Isn't mutual trust a prerequisite for democracy?

I know the common complaints that many teachers voice about outside facilitators. Teachers feel facilitators only visit to issue new directives, or else, they say, we visit once and don't return for six months. How can I balance the need for a consistent presence in the schools with the administrative end of the job?

How can I stay focused so that my interventions will be meaningful? I know my tendency to bulldoze ahead could be disasterous in this position. How can I balance the need to build consensus with the urgent need for improvement in our schools?

All of this seems a bit unreal at the moment. I need to get a clearer grasp of my duties as a facilitator/coordinator and then I can begin to put my own spin on it. I wonder if anyone's ever asked the teachers what they most need or want from the facilitators? I'll have to find out.

Until then, I'll be finishing up with my summer commitments and packing up my teacher things. Has it only been twelve years? It seems like a lifetime since I stood in front of my first class.

[Editor's note: Deb will continue her diary during the coming school year. We're looking forward to sharing the adventures of a brand-new staff developer who's committed to making her work collaborative and substantive. Deb will also serve as co-moderator of the new MiddleWeb listserve, which will begin early this fall.]


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