HEATHER
MIGDON
Diary #5
Committing
the Cardinal Sin
If veteran teachers advise only one thing consistently, it's this: The cardinal sin for a neophyte teacher is being too nice or friendly to one's students. How many times have we heard (or said), "Your students have friends. What they need is a teacher."
And it's definitely true that if you don't teach them how to multiply fractions, they probably aren't going to learn it anywhere else. However, I'm beginning to think that it's possible for students to be so distant from their teachers that the effectiveness of instruction is minimized, if not depleted entirely.
At certain schools, it would be an understatement to say that students hate the teachers. Even worse, I would say that sometimes the feeling is mutual. Students comply with teachers' demands if and when they feel that being screamed at and/or suspended is an undesirable consequence. Most students do the very minimum they can to avoid these consequences, and rarely do students seek to exceed their teachers' expectations, no matter how low they might be set. Predictably, their standardized test scores often reflect these dismal conditions.I can't hold them at arm's length
Having little in common with my students — racially, socio-economically, religiously, or even geographically — I simply don't feel that I can afford that type of relationship with my students. While I'm far from a pushover, I have acted in ways that some teachers would object to.
At my school, I've ignored the dirty looks some teachers give when I occasionally dare to sit down and eat lunch with my class. Although I would not deny it if asked, I do not broadcast the fact that my students have my cell phone number, and I regularly encourage them to call me if they have any problems — academic or otherwise.
Until a few days ago, I thought that my students were afraid of, or had no interest in, calling me. Then, in the midst of almost a week's worth of snow days, I got a call from one of my students asking me if I had any ideas on a topic she could pursue for the school science fair. I was surprised only because science is the one subject that I do not teach, and the designated science teacher had offered her help to students in the sixth grade several times. We talked about a few different ideas she and I had, and we decided that she would think about which one of the topics interested her the most and begin her project and research. We spoke briefly about the unusually heavy snow storm, and she thanked me for my help. While nothing extraordinary happened during our conversation, her call made me realize that students are most likely to seek help from people they trust. This student has many friends, and I do not desire to be one of them. But students need to see their teachers as caring, and they need to believe that their teacher cares about their success — or they might never be able to multiply those dreaded fractions.
