Raising Twice-Exceptional Children: A Handbook for Parents of Neurodivergent Gifted Kids
By Emily Kircher-Morris
(Routledge/Prufrock Press, 2022- Learn more)
Reviewed by Amy Estersohn
I can imagine a parent or teacher innocently asking, “What is twice-exceptional, and how do I know if I am working with a twice-exceptional child?” without realizing that identifying a twice (or multiple) exceptional student is as much a challenge as working with that exceptional student.
In short, a twice-exceptional student is gifted and has one (or more) learning differences. Some examples of a twice-exceptional student could include
● A child with a high IQ and ADHD
● A quick-thinking student with exceptional verbal skills who struggles with printed reading material due to dyslexia
● A passionate and curious learner who also has autism
● A deeply creative person whose slow processing interferes with test performance
Some twice-exceptional children earn high grades in accelerated classes while others may pose significant academic and behavioral challenges in the classroom. Some may be identified quickly while others may have developed significant masking and compensation strategies to “hide” their exceptionalities from teachers, adults, and others.
A diagnosis can be a sigh of relief to a student or parent asking, “Why me?” Finding a psychologist who is familiar with twice-exceptional children and how different exceptionalities can skew testing one way or another is key towards receiving a comprehensive diagnosis.
Emily Kircher-Morris writes this parent handbook through her role as a mental health counselor, the host of The Neurodiversity Podcast, and a self-identified neurodivergent person.
Lifelong skills beyond a diagnosis
The emphasis of this handbook is on lifelong skills for twice and multiply exceptional students. It is based on the premise that all children deserve to be treated as whole, and that their unique qualities should be affirmed and celebrated. Rather than provide an external, rewards-based system for desired behaviors, Kircher-Morris identifies key skills that twice-exceptional children often work to develop and devotes a chapter to each one.
Those skills are:
Self-Advocacy. Kircher-Morris writes, “Those around the twice-exceptional child assume that something as ‘simple’ as asking for help should be no problem for a child who can expound on the nature of the space-time continuum” (105). She uses Deb Douglas’s work to discuss how academically advanced students ask for help.
Emotional Regulation. The chapter focuses on understanding emotions and learning what a proportional reaction to the challenge or setback may be. This chapter is inspired by Dr. Michelle Borba’s writings.
Executive Functioning. Kircher-Morris advocates for a scientific method-like approach where students study their habits and begin to form hypotheses, collect data, and analyze results, like, “Will setting an alarm on my phone help me remember to bring my trumpet home from school?”
Effective Social Communication. Many twice-exceptional students find peer relationships challenging. Kircher-Morris presents pros and cons of different kinds of social experiences (e.g. online friends) and creatively brainstorms ways that twice-exceptional students can have meaningful and constructive social experiences.
Self-Directed Motivation. A values inquiry model is provided to help students identify and align their reasoning and inspiration for their behaviors.
Each of these skills is addressed through the lens of self-acceptance. Kircher encourages, “When you start working on the skills that your child needs for success, recognize each success as a step closer to your child’s goals… It is possible they may never completely ‘catch up,’ but remember that catching up isn’t necessarily the goal. The goal is to help them learn to work with their strengths and through their struggles. And every little bit of progress is worth celebrating” (89).
A parenting handbook: not a manual, textbook, or research guide
This clear, quick, and easy-to-browse volume has a parent audience in mind. (Hey, it even says so on the cover.) Graduate students, researchers, or parents who are interested in the science behind these diagnoses and interventions will find that the references to other articles and research are thin and there are no recommendations for further reading in the book.
I don’t think the busy, frantic parent is going to mind, but I can see the graduate student or independent researcher finding this book less than what they need in the way of robust scientific inquiry.
For more on twice exceptional learners, read Emily Kircher-Morris’s MiddleWeb article Help Twice-Exceptional (2e) Learners Flourish along with this review of her book Teaching Twice-Exceptional Learners in Today’s Classroom.
Amy Estersohn is a teacher and college admissions consultant who has worked with twice-exceptional students. She runs a College Spotlight newsletter and can be reached at leadwithtalents@gmail.com.
Until recently, the Multigenre Research Project (MGRP) was practically unheard of. While similar to Project Based Learning (PBL), the MGRP goes much deeper into activating student interest and encouraging them to take ownership of their own learning.
Where did the summer go? Here we are preparing for, or maybe already beginning, another school year. Whether you are a new or returning teacher, a new school year is exciting, but it can also be stressful.
Before jumping into the decorating aspect of your classroom set up, take the time to consider what is currently in your classroom. Set aside a day or two to weed out old files, manipulatives, classroom library books, or any type of basket/shelving that has seen better days. To give the classroom a fresh start, get rid of the “clutter” that can many times sabotage your best efforts to organize.
Students are never too old to enjoy hearing books read aloud and to benefit from the impact of their content. Middle school students need consistent opportunities to learn about, practice and discuss social emotional skills. These skills aid students in their behavioral and academic growth.
Overview: Jabari begins the day looking forward to jumping off the diving board for the first time but realizes he might feel a little scared and uncertain about jumping. His dad lets him know that it is okay to feel scared and that sometimes when dad feels scared, he takes a deep breath, and it feels less scary and more like a surprise. Jabari climbs back to the top of the diving board, thinks about how he likes surprises, and jumps.
Overview: This book reads like a lyrical poem and shows a young girl giving herself affirmations. Throughout the book the reader is given concrete and abstract examples of affirmations that encourage loving who you are and being kind to others. The book ends with the empowering quote, “I am enough.”
Overview: This book starts with an introduction about mindfulness and why it is important. The book then has a collection of poems written about mindfulness in a variety of styles. Some of the poems read like breathing exercises. While the poems can be read out of order, they seem to follow from one poem to the next, and if possible, it would be beneficial to read them in order from cover to cover.
Questions:
Overview: Brian isn’t noticed by his teacher or his peers. He goes through most school days unnoticed. He loves to draw and spends his free time at school drawing creative scenes. When a new student, Justin, joins their class, the students laugh at him because he is different. Then Brian and Justin become friends.
Overview: Thao shares her own experiences of growing up with a name that most people mispronounced and misspelled. She shares how it felt to temporarily change her name to something easier to pronounce. Her experience shows the importance of taking the time to learn to pronounce names correctly along with the power of loving your name, and encourages the reader to think about the significance of a name.
Overview: It is Carmela’s birthday and her wish of being old enough to go to town with her brother has come true. She picks a dandelion, and she starts to think about the perfect wish. As they travel, she notices different aspects of her town and imagines different things that she dreams for her and her family. Then she falls on her scooter and drops the flower. She begins to cry because she has lost her wish. Her brother then surprises her and takes her to a place where “the sky was full of wishes.”
Overview: The images and words come together to tell the story of how one little mistake on a painting inspires good ideas and more mistakes lead to a masterpiece. It shows readers the value of making mistakes and how it can lead to new ideas and discoveries.
Overview: The book tells the story of Chloe who ignores Maya, a new student in her class, even when Maya reaches out and tries to have conversations and play with her. Chloe laughs with her friends about Maya’s clothes and what she brings for lunch. But she begins to realize the value of kindness after her teacher demonstrates how kindness has a ripple effect with a bowl of water and pebbles. Then one day Maya moves to a new school, and Chloe realizes she’s lost her opportunity to ever be kind to Maya.
Overview: This book highlights all the amazing things about a young boy. Some are concrete examples, and others are more abstract and encourage the reader to interpret the meaning. It leaves the reader with positive feelings and many examples of how someone might be “good.”
Overview: This book is filled with poems about giving that are accompanied by beautiful illustrations. It includes poems about sharing your lunch with someone who doesn’t have one, donating hair, cleaning up a river, planting trees, and much more. Each of the poems can be read alone and in any order, but there is power in a collective reading about the many ways we can give and help others.
Overview: This thoughtful picture book tells the story of a crayon that is labeled as red but, no matter how hard it tries, always colors blue. The crayon is sad and frustrated as everyone pressures it to be red. Finally, the crayon realizes and accepts that it is a blue crayon; it is then happy, relieved, and excited to be who it was meant to be. This story shows the value of being who you are and accepting others for who they are.
Overview: This beautifully illustrated book tells the story of a child who is struggling with one problem that is causing him great anxiety. Ignoring the problem does not help; in fact, it is not until he finally faces the problem that he finds a solution. This book encourages readers to examine problems closely rather than running away from them – because with problems come opportunities for growth.
Overview: This engagingly illustrated book tells the story of what happens after Humpty Dumpty’s fall from the wall. Readers learn that he has developed a fear of heights that causes him to miss out on things he loves to do. The ending shows young readers the benefits of getting back up after a literal or figurative fall.
As they transition from elementary school into the middle grades, students start asking those hard questions, like 
How Learning Works: A Playbook takes readers on a deep dive into research and learning theory. For me, the purpose of this book is on page 3 of the Introduction: “Knowing how learning works can help us design experiences that amplify our students’ learning outcomes.”
